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John James, founder of The Grief Recovery Institute

John W. James

Founder of The Grief Recovery Institute®
Co-Author of The Grief Recovery
Handbook & When Children Grieve

Ask The Grief Experts

The death of someone important to you creates a large pool of emotion; and when you add a second major death, the emotional equation goes up exponentially. (Published 12/10/13)


Came home from Denver to care-give for both parents in 2010. Dad died last year of Alzhiemer's in a rest home. I took care of Mom, who had many health issues, until she died last week. I have no regrets giving up my life in Denver to come home for two years. Mom died last week at Mayo Clinic of an diverticuli abscess the doctors missed. They tried to save her at Mayo but couldn't. I'm so heartbroken, sad, angry at what happened. She didn't need to die and I want to sue the Wisconsin doctors for their screw-up. Her death hasn't really hit me yet. Still trying to get over Dad's death. To lose both parents in one year is hard, and yet now I face going back to start my life and future again and I am so afraid and scared after care-giving for two years with my life on hold. What can I do to help myself with discerning all this? A trip to Disneyland? A cruise? I don't want to make a rash decision, but need time. House needs to be sold, etc.

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