Q & A with David Kessler
Question from Lisa
Hi David,
I've written you before, something about your face is trusting. I still cry everyday over my son's passing the day after his 29th birthday (5/16/05). I see him everywhere I go. The memories are tearing me up rather than comfort me. Oh well, another day down.
God bless.
Lisa
Answer from David
Dear Lisa,
Another day down is also another way of saying, one day at a time. I think you’re on the right track. I can’t imaging how hard it is to deal with your son’s passing, and I hope for you that as you hurt it will eventually hurt less often and that those memories some day become comforting. But the reality is you’re not there yet. If you have those memories and feel like crying, sit down and cry. If you have 1,000 tears to cry, you can’t stop at 200. I don’t know if this is possible for you, but as time goes on if you still see him everywhere, say to him, “I promise you that I will never forget you”. And maybe even in time when you see his face in places or reminders of him, you can begin to thank him for being in your life and still remaining in your life. Ultimately, in grief, we have to form a new relationship with the deceased. Your relationship with your son will never end. Your hearts will always be connected. I wish you peace and comfort on this unknown terrain that you now travel.
David
I've written you before, something about your face is trusting. I still cry everyday over my son's passing the day after his 29th birthday (5/16/05). I see him everywhere I go. The memories are tearing me up rather than comfort me. Oh well, another day down.
God bless.
Lisa
Answer from David
Dear Lisa,
Another day down is also another way of saying, one day at a time. I think you’re on the right track. I can’t imaging how hard it is to deal with your son’s passing, and I hope for you that as you hurt it will eventually hurt less often and that those memories some day become comforting. But the reality is you’re not there yet. If you have those memories and feel like crying, sit down and cry. If you have 1,000 tears to cry, you can’t stop at 200. I don’t know if this is possible for you, but as time goes on if you still see him everywhere, say to him, “I promise you that I will never forget you”. And maybe even in time when you see his face in places or reminders of him, you can begin to thank him for being in your life and still remaining in your life. Ultimately, in grief, we have to form a new relationship with the deceased. Your relationship with your son will never end. Your hearts will always be connected. I wish you peace and comfort on this unknown terrain that you now travel.
David
