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Joel was my brother; my only sibling. He loved golf and "Dancing with the Stars". He was very funny and loved animals; especially blond cocker spaniels.

When he was 14, we learned he had diabetes; a "disability" he never accepted and never learned to handle. It was that inability to accept the disease that eventually took his life at the too-early age of 50.

I wish he were still here; but that is not an option for those he left behind; I hope he knows how much he was loved and still is loved by his family and many friends.

It's only been a few months and he's usually the last thought I have at night and the first thought I have upon waking. Recently, I finally became able to talk about him without feeling only sadness. The fond memories are slowly making the profound loss manageable. But there will always be a hole in my life and heart. I miss him terribly but I know that he is now at peace and playing golf everyday at God's country club.

Although we lived across the US from each other; we "watched" PGA tour events together, using our free week-end minutes. When Jan Van de Val had the meltdown at the 1999 British Open, Joel and I were on the phone screaming about how could any player, even a Frenchman, be so dumb. Often during a tournament, my phone would ring and I would answer with, "Can you believe that shot?" or I'd call Joel and he'd answer with the same salutation. The Masters this year was the first in many years, I had no one to call. And the recent Saturday play at the Players Championship would have been one of Joel's favorite golf days. I hope he was watching it from heaven.

According to a golf buddy, Joel knew every rule and was always in charge of keeping the game legal and fair. He shot in the mid 80s; an amazing average for a weekend duffer.

One of my favorite memories: Joel began singing at an early age; he had a wonderful voice and sang solos in church throughout his life. One evening, when he couldn't have been more than 6 years old, he began singing at the dinner table. Dad told him that it was bad manners to sing at the table. Joel thought for a moment; jumped up; stood behind his chair and continued to sing.

11/12/2007 - It's been a year since you left us, baby brother, and I have thought about you everyday. I woke up this morning at the same time you died last year - just was suddenly awake. I know you have peace now. But you will never be forgotten. Play a round today for Peter and me.